Happy Sneak a Zucchini onto your Neighbor's Porch Day!

I knew Tricia and I were meant to be friends when I discovered our love for this holiday! Ways to successfully get rid of excess zucchini: -Carefully place a dozen or more zucchini in a large, sturdy black plastic trash bag, then add a couple layers of unwanted clothing. Drive to nearest Goodwill or Salvation Army, hand over bag to nearest volunteer. Politely refuse any offered receipt. Leave quickly. -Look for out-of-the-way places which have signs posted, "Clean Fill Wanted." -Under light of full moon, either stark naked or wearing full army camouflage, carrying a machete or any garden implement, run amuck in your zucchini patch, cutting and slashing. Be sure to thank Mother Nature for her bounty before and after this cathartic experience. -Buy a large roll of freezer paper--the kind that sub shops use. Then proceed to wrap each zucchini that has managed to grow to a foot or more in length. Next time your child has a fundraiser, send him or her out supplied with these phony subs. Tell child to drop them off with neighbors or relatives and leave quickly. It's advisable that a responsible adult hover nearby in a get-away car. -Gather all available plastic containers and freezer bags. Drink a vat of your favorite caffeinated beverage, in preparation for staying up 'round the clock to purée large quantities of zucchini. This can then be packaged neatly and artistically labeled: "For Zucchini Nut Bread Recipe." These packages can be freely given, along with copies of recipe, to anyone on your Christmas list.

Any other suggestions on how to celebrate?